Whaaahhhhhhh

“Sara, you’re a hard read”, he says. A hard read? Really? Golly mister, maybe you’re expecting too much.

I’ve heard varying forms of this before, you know, accusatory, damning, begging for an end to the ambiguity. I have been directly labeled
selfish,
confusing,
cold…

Maybe it’s something I should work on; being more straight forward…

Truth is,
Sometimes I really don’t care that much one way or the other and I think that is really hard for some people to understand.

BUT I REALLY.DON’T.CARE.

Of course there are people in this world for whom I feel strongly one way or another—there are probably about four. But I’m not taking any applications for new friends or partners or whatever right now-I don’t have time and I’m not too worried about it.

Am I a “hard read” if I am honest and say “it really doesn’t matter” (of course I want to say “you really don’t matter to me”--but I'm nice)? I’d say that’s pretty damn clear. The functional error appears to be in the reception of the message, rather than the delivery.

People are awesome (and I wonder if I really mean that) but so many present with a lot of BS that I just don’t want to wade through at this point. Being truthful or clear or “easily read” doesn’t mean telling some whining-loser-jackass who I let entertain me once in a while exactly what he wants to hear does it? It’s not my role to buffer some emotionally vaginal, validation seeking crybaby from reality, is it?

I don’t care.